Fatal mistakes that turn a first date into the last

Роковые ошибки, которые превращают первое свидание в последнее

Fatal mistakes that turn a first date into the last
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Picture: Katerina MARTINOVIC

Sometimes one small detail can ruin it. It’s terrible, but it’s true.

In my youth there was a whole scheme of evaluating potential suitors. It does not matter how much he earns and whether smokes cheap cigarettes. The main thing was to listen to the right music, wore black jeans and definitely knew who the Brodsky with Gershwin. Because after Gershwin the man just can’t understand Timati and sing “Hands up!”.

This I now know that the bad musical taste of people to hate is impossible, but when in the 90s the young man invited me to karaoke and sang a song Buynova with the words “You are my bamboo tamed and responsible for him. Throw chocolate rabbits and try it,” I really wanted to pour it with gasoline and throw a match.

My friend Mary calls these things “the extinguisher of passion.” All is well in the man – a decent family, higher education, maybe even a good dancing… but suddenly gaze falls on his pinky with the long fingernail and the will to continue the dialogue instantly disappears. Or suddenly notice under his shirt with a bullet pendant on a leather cord. “It protects against vampires”, – he explained after, but you go running to the taxi, muttering to himself “La La La” and plugging his ears.

Even more disgusting to a man I consider greed. So come to the supermarket, and he said: “You could not pay for my whisky, and I my wallet in the car forgotten.” And, perhaps even to sex is not reached (and after this, and will not come for sure), and the man already wants to spend your money. Frustrating is the right word.

Another annoying overage Mama’s boy. One invited me to the dinner he promised to cook pasta with shrimp. But in the process forgot something important and began to call her mother, asking to dictate the recipe. Mom, without thinking, rushed to the rescue. Cooked pasta, drank our wine until midnight and watched TV with us. Romantic, isn’t it?

Do men in our time do not have much romance, excitement. More about this Stanislaw LEM wrote. Early love always bordered on heroism, passion. The man loved the woman of his bravado, risky actions. “Orpheus went down into the land of the dead to bring Eurydice back. Othello killed for love. The tragedy of Romeo and Juliet… Now there is no longer tragedies. There is even the likelihood of their existence.”

Current lovers don’t have duels, don’t sing under the Windows of the romances, and technical TEXT and emoticons rose. Why pursue one woman if the Dating site you are waiting for the 18 million potential brides?

And we somehow want surprises and miracles, but where to take them?

In response, the

All decided to “hurdy-gurdy”


I have had two wives. With the first part of the musical tastes were in complete harmony. My wife perhaps even a little ahead. In the sense that it not only took (and, incidentally, well knew) my Lou reed and nick cave, but still managed to instill in me a love of Erik Satie. In General, the soundtrack of our family life was fine. No Buynova with its legendary bamboo.

We broke up for reasons far removed from music. And while broken up, I often imagined how happy would be my fate if I hadn’t been so choosy and would reject in advance the kind and pretty girls, listening to “Hands up!” or Bogdan Titomir (Timothy did not yet exist). Say, these girls are flexible in nature and they are good hostess.

The second time I got married too suddenly. There was so violent passion (from himself did not expect, really) that I hastily missed the main thing. Well, here it is – the price paid for carelessness, soon began: “Oh, how tired of this your routine (she’s talking about nick cave!), Yes, and all the time in English.” And one day when the TV Basque sang about the hurdy-gurdy, and I changed the channel, she said, “Well, why did you switch, Kohl’s cool.” And I realized that with this woman we do not live together. Although two years, once lived. By the way, and the mistress she was so-so.

In the evening after my divorce, I gathered friends, we drank in the feeling of freedom and listened to a different routine in foreign languages.

I thought a lot about what it’s probably horribly wrong when the high emotions are some small parts. Well, I think, likes she Baskov or even laugh at jokes Petrosian. Probably because there is something that truly unites loving hearts, makes them beat in unison. And sometimes I almost managed to convince himself. Once I even made a vow to myself not to pay any attention to it – it’s painful, the girl was beautiful. And it is, incidentally, not Baskov loved, and his that, in General, more or less acceptable.

But once she came out in denim shorts over tights brown… And I realized: we have to accept the fact that I never see women of my dreams. Most likely, it simply does not exist.

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