Popular psychological mechanism that hinders us in achieving the goals

Популярный психологический механизм, который тормозит нас в достижении целей

Often to achieve some result impossible due to the fact that a thought, “what will people say?”. This is one of the popular reasons not to do what we want – to engage in love affair, not to end the relationship, which has exhausted itself, or will I go from boring work. We found out why people react to what others say and what hides behind it.

The phrase “what will people say?” hidden psychological technique of protection against any changes. To your attention the three most popular reasons why people don’t do what you want.

1. In the phrase “what will people say?” he says in the first place, your shame or guilt, which refer to a specific person. Most likely, it came from childhood, from the fact that someone important to you evaluate your capabilities and said that you can do and what not pull.

To change this situation, think about who do you now support? What kind of support do you now want to? And to whom do you feel guilty? It is important to understand if you want to get freedom from public opinion, you must obtain it yourself and not wait for the situation to change itself.

2. When other people are saying about you, in fact it turns out what they say about themselves. For example, when a woman says: “You’re a mother stay home with the baby a little longer”, you probably meant that: “I would also like to build a career, but I’m afraid that won’t work”.

Or “You wife – you need to prepare a delicious soup, then with her husband good will”, and meant: “I’d like to change something in my life, but afraid that her husband will not approve and the parents will not understand.”

Here is the depreciation, which is also a method of psychological protection. Understand what is important to you, and achieve this goal in small steps, recording them on paper. In the moments when someone is trying to reproach you, “what will people say?” – go back to the list and see how much you have already achieved, and move on.

3. People still on you. Often people think about themselves and their life, and in the moments when they somehow “appreciate” your actions, you still continue to think about yourself. People either want to do something like you, or happy that we were able to do something better than you. But again, it’s not in you but in themselves.

Concentrate on yourself, your desires, goals and opportunities. Your life is in your hands, and you should not let other people to manage it.