Smile a new day. Jokes for a good mood on 10 January 2019

Jokes for a good mood on January 10, 2019.

Посміхніться новому дню. Анекдоти для доброго настрою на 10 січня 2019 року

Positive emotions are important to humans, it is therefore necessary to regularly replenish the good mood of cheerful anecdotes, informs Rus.Media.

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Judge:
– The reason of your divorce?
The plaintiff:
– I learned that the owner of the apartment that we rented for two years, was himself!
Judge:
– It’s brilliant!

***

Went outside, and there’s winter again. It is that every day now?

***

– Who is the most faithful four-legged friend?
Bed.

***

Five year old Daniel asked what he wants to be:
– Danya, I want to be a pilot?
– No, they are broken…
– Well, then, captain?
– No, they sink…
– Well, what then?
I’ll be the mattresses to do!
– Why?!
– Do – lay, do – lay…

***

Citizens! Who forgot the bag with the jelly in the foyer of the Opera?

***

Sometimes I dream this nightmare I’m in school, write an algebra quiz. Fortunately, I quickly Wake up in a rented one-room apartment with two loans…

***

Why Syrian refugees fleeing to Europe and not to Russia?
Because they were scared, not crazy.

***

– Why did you run away from the marriage from the bride?
– She came with the order “Mother-heroine”!

***

All my childhood house there lived a cat, when he died, my parents make me feel better, said he got married and he now lives with his wife. I believe and sincerely wished him happiness…

***

The fact that in 32 years I’m still not married, just means that statistically I avoided his first divorce.

***

– Honey, don’t worry! Really you’re not fat!
– Why do you think I’m upset about your weight?
– Well, how… it’s obvious!

***

There are no ugly men, they get a little money…

***

– Where are you going, Prince Ivan? – In the open field. My father told me from a bow to shoot, at whose yard the boom is down there and the bride to take…

– A grenade to an arrow why screwed?

– Passion as to marry does not want!.

***

I don’t know how they were able to break the password on my laptop?

– What’s your password?

– The year of the canonization of St. Dominic by Pope Gregory IX.

– And what year was this?

– 1234.

***

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