Smile a new day. Jokes for a good mood on 10 January 2019

Jokes for a good mood on January 10, 2019.

Positive emotions are important to humans, it is therefore necessary to regularly replenish the good mood of cheerful anecdotes, informs Rus.Media.

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Judge:
– The reason of your divorce?
The plaintiff:
– I learned that the owner of the apartment that we rented for two years, was himself!
Judge:
– It’s brilliant!

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Went outside, and there’s winter again. It is that every day now?

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– Who is the most faithful four-legged friend?
Bed.

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Five year old Daniel asked what he wants to be:
– Danya, I want to be a pilot?
– No, they are broken…
– Well, then, captain?
– No, they sink…
– Well, what then?
I’ll be the mattresses to do!
– Why?!
– Do – lay, do – lay…

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Citizens! Who forgot the bag with the jelly in the foyer of the Opera?

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Sometimes I dream this nightmare I’m in school, write an algebra quiz. Fortunately, I quickly Wake up in a rented one-room apartment with two loans…

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Why Syrian refugees fleeing to Europe and not to Russia?
Because they were scared, not crazy.

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– Why did you run away from the marriage from the bride?
– She came with the order “Mother-heroine”!

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All my childhood house there lived a cat, when he died, my parents make me feel better, said he got married and he now lives with his wife. I believe and sincerely wished him happiness…

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The fact that in 32 years I’m still not married, just means that statistically I avoided his first divorce.

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– Honey, don’t worry! Really you’re not fat!
– Why do you think I’m upset about your weight?
– Well, how… it’s obvious!

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There are no ugly men, they get a little money…

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– Where are you going, Prince Ivan? – In the open field. My father told me from a bow to shoot, at whose yard the boom is down there and the bride to take…

– A grenade to an arrow why screwed?

– Passion as to marry does not want!.

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I don’t know how they were able to break the password on my laptop?

– What’s your password?

– The year of the canonization of St. Dominic by Pope Gregory IX.

– And what year was this?

– 1234.

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