Jokes for a good mood on February 8, 2019.
Positive emotions are important to humans, it is therefore necessary to regularly replenish the good mood of cheerful anecdotes, informs Rus.Media.
Sunday morning. Balcony 2 ladies from Odessa.
– Sirocco, you sho ill?
– Yes from what you took?
– Why to you every morning the doctor comes?
– Well and what? And if you every morning comes major, Shaw, the war began.
– Let’s buy my shoes!
– Then obimo!
– Will you drink?
– What is it?
I got an ulcer.
– Where? In the intestine, in the stomach?
– In the family.
If the woman is once again getting married, so he was into it…
– My father sold a car to have money for gasoline.
– Granddaughters! Call an ambulance – it’s a new account for the apartment and now grandpa will come to watch.
The economic news. On the package of buckwheat yet set a weight and not number of grains.
The wife laments her husband:
– I was deaf and blind when I married you!
– You see, from any of the diseases I cured you!
– What good is your fasting? After all, you did not lose weight.
But a wallet as fat!
If a woman is against, it does not mean that she did not agree.
It is nice to break and eat a berry straight from the Bush and a cucumber from the garden! Especially from someone else’s garden!
– Darling, tell me why do you love me?
Yes, that eye!
– Did you like my gentle and affectionate look?
– No, I did not wear glasses and very poorly seen.
The store sports equipment. Buyer:
– And how do I open this parachute?
– Oh! It is our most reliable system. It opens automatically when hitting the ground.
– Good there where we are not.
– Not true! Over the moon we are not, and it is cold and empty.
Politeness is organized indifference.
Of snowfall this year, I do not remember even the old-timers of the village Goduke. As our correspondent found out, recently, the old village Gadyno don’t remember anything.
Want to stay with people in a good relationship – do not bother them to lie.
The wife says to her husband:
– If you had 2 million, what would you do?
– One million to be spent.
– A second?
– You buy seeds.
– Why so many?
For you to have your mouth was always busy.
A young Jew eats in a day of fasting. His old father is outraged:
– Guard what are you doing? Look at me, I’m old and sick, but fasting.
– Dad, don’t worry, neither I nor you will go to heaven. Because I do not observe lent, and you because there is no Paradise.
– That is tired, that’s from nervous tension, and it is from depression.
– Thank you doctor. And you have whiskey besides nothing?