Smile a new day. Jokes for a good mood on the 11th of February 2019

Jokes for a good mood on 11 Feb 2019.

Посміхніться новому дню. Анекдоти для доброго настрою на 11 лютого 2019 року

Positive emotions are important to humans, it is therefore necessary to regularly replenish the good mood of cheerful anecdotes, informs Rus.Media.

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Leaving my body to science. To scientists of the future know how to look people without tattoos.

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Mother, I the dishes washed, homework done, school or graduated from University, got married, children born, can I go for a walk?

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The lawyer calls the customer to clarify issues regarding the funeral:

– Tonight, died, your mother-in-law. What to order: the funeral, cremation or embalming?

– Make everything you do not want to risk it!

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A man in the village bought a Zebra, then it comes to him and the neighbor says

– WAN, let go.

– Take it, but gently…

He rode up and says:

– Well, Vanya, you can feel the car is a foreign car!

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The owner of the store of winter clothing changes coats like gloves.

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A leader is not someone who walks ahead of everyone, and the one in the back is customized.

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Here you counted poverty benefits, but you have the last year debt on tax for parasitism.

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Your diploma is so not ready that paper for him is still growing somewhere in the woods.

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– Sirocco, why did you stop?

– Sam, don’t bother me. I have gone to.

– So long as I can remember, you were not yourself?

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Deleted the number, not to talk shit.

Now nervous of what he does not know what he is a beast!

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But I could be rich if I had the money.

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– Like when the mother-in-law is correct: don’t yell at you, football watching, beer drinks with you.

Here father – in-law mother-in-law right!

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– You know, I think my wife wants to divorce me.

– Why do you think so?

– Yesterday, she gave us her friend from work.

– So what?

– So beautiful!

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For someone only driving permit and for the inspector – bread card.

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I look young, because all the lying, that to me ten years more.

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– Today it is difficult to marry well.

– It’s much harder today to retire.

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– How to divide 3 roses between the two mistresses, not to offend anyone?

One rose has to give his wife…

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A person comes to Gypsy:

– I’m your son in his barn caught…

– Of course, in the pantry easy – you try it in the field to catch!

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– I was a fool when married you!

– I knew that, but I had hope that with time you porosomes.

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Investors joke:

“The stock market is different from casino the fact that casino are treated to champagne, before Rob to the bone.”

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– What’s your name?

Roma.

Roma, where do you work?

Well… Actually I am a Gypsy.

– I hope on our street you’re not working?

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The older the woman, the more she was convinced that men wanted her mind and talk.

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– I earn enough? So my salary can contain three such women as you!

Very good. Then it’s settled.

– What?

– Tomorrow we are moving my mother and grandmother.

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