To avoid conflicts between spouses

To avoid conflicts between spouses

Domestic violence exists and according to some data the pandemic has not helped matters. While women report physical violence more, it should be borne in mind that verbal violence can also be harmful. In this book, the French author Jacques Salomé, known for his philosophy of life and his wisdom, wanted with his wife to review certain behaviors to avoid falling into the trap.

Jacques Salomé, social psychologist and trainer in human relations, who has written no less than 75 books on personal development, this time tackles verbal violence in couple relationships. It was he who had the idea of recalling the power of certain destructive words, which are unfortunately too often addressed to the person we love. A violence, less spectacular certainly, but much more devious to which we even become tolerant. Nevertheless, this violence will inevitably have long-term repercussions. “This type of violence which is played out in private is still, to this day, a taboo subject”, confides the author, fervent activist for relational communication without violence. “This violence will continue to eat away at the mind, hurt the soul, give rise to fears and doubts. ”

The evils that hide our words

Conjugal violence, these are also words!
Jacques and Valeria Salomé
New Life Hugo Publishing
160 pages “> Conjugal violence, these are also words!
Jacques and Valeria Salomé
New Life Hugo Publishing
160 pages

Inspired by many testimonies he has received, this book provides solutions to different attitudes related to verbal violence.

Manipulation is one of the causes. The idea of reconciling after a conflict adds to the problem rather than identifying its sources. “All violence is a remedy, it is a sign of impotence in a certain way”, Jacques Salomé points out. Among the conditions that generate this kind of behavior, the author has specifically targeted the frustration of an expectation, the feeling of injustice, insecurity, disappointment and even revenge.

Seen from the outside, one can wonder why a couple stays together despite verbal violence. The author has often observed that some women remain in an unhealthy couple relationship for fear of lack, especially that of lack of financial resources. “There is also the fear of reprisals, such as threats or aggressive behavior, as well as the fear of loneliness, not to mention the many imaginary fears, such as denigration or the gaze of others”, specifies the author.

To avoid the worst

The best attitude to adopt to avoid the worst is undoubtedly to learn to communicate and to listen to others, even in the unspoken.

“To find a way out of the spread of violence, you have to identify its origins,” says Valeria Salomé. Behind a word, there is hiding conflicts, wounds and unspoken, this is where you have to look. It is often the cry of distant suffering. ”

To live a healthy relationship, it is important not to harbor resentments, reproaches or resentments. The relationship must be built on trust and respect for the other and their needs. Undertaking a work on oneself or a therapeutic process can be a starting solution. Otherwise, you have to let go of the relationship and the idea that it will eventually work out on its own over time.

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